Postpartum, that huge word for after, incredibly enveloping, almost heavy and all too often frightening, postpartum involves many stages and trials that mothers have no choice but to take on. From projections to tangible realities, from hypervigilance to exhaustion, and from turbulence to self-transcendence: the challenges of the postpartum period, in a nutshell.
CONTENTS
- The reality of postpartum: a period of great upheaval
- Physiological postpartum
- Surrounding yourself and resting after childbirth: living the Golden Month
- Preparing for the challenges of the postpartum period: a new truth to understand
The reality of postpartum: a period of great upheaval
The post-partum - or post-delivery - period has a reality all of its own. While your body needs rest more than ever and, as a woman and new mother, you're searching for your new compass, life now demands your undivided attention for your newborn. Where you might have expected unclouded happiness, in reality there is adversity.
A sometimes intense gap between dreams of motherhood and reality
The first postpartum reality comes before the postpartum. It's childbirth. Whether it's a precipitous birth or an unscheduled Caesarean sectionBetween 15% and 20% of women every year experience a traumatic birth, some of whom will go on to suffer psychological and/or physical after-effects that may complicate the post-partum period.
Lhypervigilance is another potential consequence of entering the postpartum period. It manifests itself in various ways, including constant fear for the baby's health, frequent insomnia and disturbances of mood, concentration or appetite, which can lead to exhaustion.
Baby clash is another post-partum challenge that, this time, concerns not only mothers, but the couple as a whole. The birth of a child, and the fatigue and stress that accompany this incredible upheaval, can sometimes lead to tension in the couple, arguments and even separation. To avoid or overcome a baby clash, it's essential to be kind and take time for yourself.
Deeper post-partum depression is another danger of the post-partum period. It generally manifests itself as sadness, fatigue, sudden crying and a feeling of not being able to care for your child properly. In the most severe cases, a lack of interest in family life and gloomy thoughts appear, but post-partum depression can also be silent.
If, like most postpartum challenges, maternal maternal regret remains a taboo subject, it's one of the trials young mothers sometimes face a few months after the birth of their child. Maternal regret is an intimate and complex feeling, difficult to express. Mothers who experience it say they love their child, but regret having become mothers, in the sense that the role seems too heavy, too cumbersome and too permanent.
L'amaternal burnoutor maternal burn-out, can occur at any time, but particularly affects mothers of young children. More profound than baby blues, it is an additional risk for mothers who feel overwhelmed by the physical and mental demands of parenthood.
Physiological postpartum
Because you're not born a mother, but learn to become one, matrescence should be a concept known to all. Identified in the 1970s and popularized very recently, matrescence is a notion that encompasses all the physical and psychological changes encountered by women when they give birth. One of the challenges of the post-partum period is learning to recognize oneself in a new body.
Because menstruation is no picnic for any of us, postpartum bleeding (also known as lochia) should be anticipated with the utmost calm. When you leave the maternity hospital, you'll be given special protection for the first few days, which can be replaced by sanitary towels or menstrual panties after a while. However, you can expect the discomfort to last for around a month.
Another period of heavy bleeding after the birth of a child is the return of childbirth. At least 45 days after giving birth, but up to several months later if you're breast-feeding, your first post-partum period starts. They're a sign that you're ready to get pregnant again, and that it's time to address the (recurring) question of contraception.
After childbirth, young mothers also have a new body to contend with. More tired and less toned - at least for a while - this body is entirely focused on the belly. A post-partum belly whose skin is generally relaxed, even distended, and often marked by stretch marks. But above all, an empty belly since the birth of your baby. Massages with vegetable oils, abdominal re-education (to be done after perineal re-education) and, above all, kindness towards yourself, will help you tame it.
The resumption of sexual activity is another major post-partum milestone for which women (and men) are often ill-prepared or unprepared. Discomfort, discomfort, vaginal dryness, even pain or apprehension, the torrid nights are a long way off. In fact, you may go several weeks without making love, and that's okay. But it's important to be aware of this, not least so that you can discuss it with your partner beforehand.
Maternal exhaustion, hypervigilance, baby clashes... The challenges of the post-partum period are numerous, sometimes difficult to recognize and all the more complex to soothe or treat. To prevent these ailments as effectively as possible, the most ancestral civilizations devoted 40 days after the birth of a child to caring for the mother. This period of extreme benevolence and maternal reconstruction is still known today as the "Golden Month".
Surrounding yourself and resting after childbirth: living the Golden Month
The Golden Month, the 40-day postnatal period, is thought to have originated in China over 2,000 years ago. However, traces of it can be found in stories from North Africa, India and, increasingly, the West.
The idea behind this age-old practice? To offer the mother a period of recovery, both physically and mentally, and to help her tame her new condition. To enhance the mother-to-be through attentive listening, kindness, patience and appropriate care.
Rest is the key to everything! Take as much time as possible to relax and unwind, every day. Taste the special moments with your newborn, enjoy the benefits of skin-to-skin contact, immerse yourself in its first glimpses, breathe in its scent... Create your own timeless bubble and leave everything else to one side. In addition to cuddles, add a good dose of massage and plenty of warmth, provided in particular by a rich diet based on warm dishes and golden spices that will help you regenerate your body and mind from the inside out.
Preparing for the challenges of the postpartum period: a new truth to understand
The more society removes post-partum taboos and recognizes the complexity and fragility of this period, the better mothers will be able to live through it. There's no doubt that dialogue, training, learning and listening, before, during and after pregnancy, help to ease the transition from woman to mother.
It's also essential that mothers never again hesitate to share their experience of motherhood as they live it, as they feel it, alongside their own stories and experiences. Communicate with the person who shares your life, with your family, with your friends, with maternity professionals, your doula or the PMI... Never doubt that there is a solution to meet your needs and help you face, one by one, the challenges of the post-partum period.
