That's it, you are pregnant, finally pregnant, pregnant again or surprise: you are pregnant! In a few words and for your greatest happiness, you are expecting a baby, it is confirmed. Now the question of announcement arises. To whom, how and especially when to announce your pregnancy? Right away ? After 12 weeks, or maybe it's 12 weeks? To all your friends, to the administration and to your employer too? Very frequent questions, to which we will try to provide answers.
SUMMARY
- Three months pregnant and a superstition
- Why announce your pregnancy after 12 weeks?
- Exclusively, the announcement to the dad
- Announce your pregnancy to loved ones and see their eyes light up
- Declare your pregnancy to the administration for proper monitoring
- Carry life and live deeply (all) its emotions
Three months pregnant and a superstition
Many couples keep their joy of expecting a child more or less secret for 3 months. You definitely know some and maybe you are one of them. A “reasonable time frame” often presented as a recommendation. But a recommendation made by whom and for what reasons?
Around 12 weeks of amenorrhea (SA) , i.e. 12 weeks after the first day of the last period, the first obligatory prenatal ultrasound takes place which allows in particular to observe the vitality of the fetus, to estimate its age and to specify the expected date of delivery.
For the majority of future parents, it is appropriate to wait for this date and confirmation that everything is going well , to announce the arrival of their child more widely. Indeed, a sort of superstition would say that a hasty announcement of pregnancy brings bad luck.
Why announce your pregnancy after 12 weeks?
Because ultrasound is the best indicator for monitoring fetal development and because the risks of miscarriage are greater during the first weeks after conception, doctors often mention the time limit of 12 weeks as a reasonable step to observe for the successful continuation of a pregnancy.
Over time, this caution turned into superstition on the part of future parents preferring to remain discreet until that date.
On the other hand, announcing your pregnancy before the end of the first trimester allows you to feel less alone in the face of the whirlwind of motherhood. By choosing one or more people to confide in , you immediately share an immense dose of happiness. In their presence, you don't have to hide, mask your nausea or justify not drinking wine! And above all, in the event of a problem or simply when faced with the ailments of pregnancy which are not always easy to manage, you feel stronger because you are more supported .
Experiencing a miscarriage and dealing with incomprehension
Each year, in France, according to the report published by MP Sandrine Josso , some 200,000 miscarriages detected occur before the 14th week of amenorrhea. In France, spontaneous abortion (detected or very early) affects or will affect 1 in 4 women during their lifetime.
Figures which reinforce the fear of a pregnancy which ends too quickly, the fear of talking about it too soon and the fear of one day having to announce bad news.
Because, if experiencing a miscarriage is an ordeal , informing those around you is another and an additional reason given by women for not immediately announcing the arrival of a baby .
But, once this term has passed, once the doubts have been lifted and the baby is firmly installed in your belly, the time has come to let your joy burst forth and announce the news to everyone around you.
Exclusively, the announcement to the dad
But yes, after you, he is the main interested party and as such, he deserves a unique announcement. The future dad, or your partner, is also the person with whom you can share the big news first , often even on the same day.
If he is not by your side when you show the positive result, take the time to sit down, breathe well, assimilate the big news and think about the best time to tell him! A dinner for two? A surprise, a letter or your pregnancy test slipped into a gift wrapper? In any case, you will be right.
Moreover, if you are expecting a baby, the entire Élhée Team is committed to your happiness. 🤍 Feel free to share it with us on Instagram . We will be delighted to see you there.
Announce your pregnancy to loved ones and see their eyes light up
Nothing is more difficult than hiding your happiness from those you love, especially when it starts to show on the curves of your body. Also, motherhood causing various ailments (such as fatigue and nausea) and some constraints, particularly dietary , the arrival of a child is not the easiest secret to keep. Not to mention the excitement! The desire to say, to share, to question, to project oneself…
The perfect moment to announce the big news to your family will therefore be the one that you feel is the right one , deep within you. Pregnancy announcement at Christmas , on the occasion of a birthday, during a family vacation or simply on a Sunday at coffee time, it's up to you.
Announcing the upcoming arrival of a child is also an opportunity to talk about the first birth gifts! Furniture, stroller, clothing, maternal care, childcare items, you can already sketch out your list.
When to tell your older child that you are pregnant?
Completely happy as a pregnant woman, you gradually become aware that your first baby, your eldest, could see things differently. Until now at the center of all attention, he will gradually have to learn to share .
Telling your child that you are pregnant should therefore always be done with joy and positivity . A good way to show him that the best news has arrived.
After waiting for the end of the first trimester and even if he already suspects something, show him your first ultrasound, your growing belly, make him guess your pregnancy in the form of a game and why not set up a little daily ritual of hugs and songs addressed to the future baby through your belly.
Declare your pregnancy to the administration for proper monitoring
Here you don't have to do anything. If the declaration of pregnancy must be sent to the CAF (Caisse d'Allocations Familiales) before the 14th week , your general practitioner or gynecologist carries it out more and more often online, following the first prenatal examination scheduled between the 9th and 12th week of amenorrhea.
If, however, you receive a pregnancy declaration in paper format, send it quickly to your CAF as well as to Health Insurance for the calculation of your aid and the payment of your birth bonus.
When to announce your pregnancy at work? You have the choice
In fact, there is no deadline requiring you to reveal your pregnancy to your employer or colleagues. Here, it's all a question of feeling.
However, the Labor Code specifies that each woman must declare her pregnancy and justify it with a medical certificate to benefit from the benefits due to her: authorization of absence for medical appointments, reduction of working hours, protection against dismissal and maternity leave. Please note that these rights apply upon notification to your employer.
Carry life and live deeply (all) its emotions
You now have the keys to choose when to announce your pregnancy to the different circles around you. But the most important element remains how you feel about this revelation. To know when to talk about the child you are carrying, you must first of all listen to your body , your desires and your own emotions .
Each couple must be able to manage the announcement of their unborn child as they wish, while respecting their rhythm, their history and their beliefs.
Keeping motherhood to yourself for three months reassures and allows you to protect yourself : either because you have already experienced the premature end of a pregnancy and the pain that accompanies it, or because you want to enjoy a few weeks of privacy and well-kept happiness.
However, more and more doctors and psychologists point out that this habit also contributes to making miscarriages that occur before the 12th week of an unannounced pregnancy invisible .
Because pregnancy and parenthood are among the most powerful and life-changing adventures of life, free yourself from dogmas, norms and diktats . Announce the arrival of your child or keep it to yourself, talk freely to everyone or admit your fears. There is no truth in this matter, only your feelings.
IN SUMMARY
When to announce your pregnancy, 12 weeks or 12 weeks?
To date a pregnancy, you can choose to speak in weeks of pregnancy (SG) or in weeks of amenorrhea (SA). The first begin on the expected day of conception of the baby, the second on the first day of the last period. To announce your pregnancy and respect the three-month recommendation, you will instead choose to wait until 12 SG.
Why wait 12 weeks to announce your pregnancy?
Because the majority of miscarriages occur in the first weeks of pregnancy, future parents are recommended to wait until the third month of pregnancy to announce to everyone the arrival of their child. It is also at this time, between the 9th and 12th week of amenorrhea, that the first prenatal ultrasound takes place.
When to announce your pregnancy to your parents?
Announcing your pregnancy to your parents, those close to you, can be done quite quickly, after confirmation of the pregnancy test and the blood test, that is, from the first days. It is possible to discuss with them the risk of miscarriage, which is greater during the first trimester.
